Makin' a List of Holiday Movies
Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?
Our Favorite Dysfunctional Families on Film
When I saw the tagline on the poster for the movie Fred Claus: "Everyone Has That One Relative That Can't Help But Cause Problems Over The Holidays. Even Santa," it got me thinking. What is it about holidays that brings out the worst in families (at least according to Hollywood)? And why is it so funny to watch these dysfunctional families in movies, but not so funny when your aunt gets drunk at Thanksgiving and tells everyone you got fat?
Here's a list of beloved families from classic holiday movies that are so dysfunctional that it almost makes us grateful for the family members we do have… except maybe that one uncle…
The McCallister Family – Home Alone
festive in Home Alone.
© 20th Century Fox
When the family of Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin) goes on vacation to spend Christmas in Paris, they forgot to pack one thing: Kevin. Oops, that's much worse than leaving the oven on. But to Kevin, who has been picked on, yelled at and treated like a baby by every family member including his own mother, this is a blessing in disguise. He finally gets the chance to be a grown up who can eat ice cream for every meal without getting in trouble. Turns out, he's a natural at being the man of the house, but Kevin quickly learns it's way more fun being a kid because the magic of the holidays is only magical when you're surrounded by loved ones, even if that includes an older brother named Buzz, always looking for a fight.
The Larsen Family – Home for the Holidays
When the life of Claudia Larson (Holly Hunter) goes from bad to worse right before Thanksgiving, she decides to head home, into the loving embrace of her family. Expecting to hear reassuring words from a mother (Anne Bancroft) that can make all her boo-boos better, she instead gets quips like, "I can see your roots, Claudia." As she is surrounded by her meddling mom, her obnoxious brother, her bitter sister, and a flatulent aunt, Claudia realizes the contradictions inherent in the words "Thanksgiving vacation."
The Griswolds – National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
© Warner Bros. Pictures
Every year my cousin sends me a Christmas letter detailing everything her family did that year. If you're a member of the Griswold family here's how that letter might read: "Last December, our Christmas tree didn't fit in the living room, distant relatives arrived empty handed and unexpectedly in their beat up RV, aunt Bethany's cat was electrocuted when it chewed on a strand of lights and the tree was burned down by uncle Lewis – only to be replaced by one that was home to a manic squirrel who terrorized our family. Better yet, instead of receiving a holiday bonus that would've funded our dream of a swimming pool, Clark's (Chevy Chase) boss enrolled him in the "Jelly of the Month" club, so Clark took his boss—and his family – hostage." Now that's a holiday card list I want to be on.
The Parker Family – A Christmas Story
Note to parents: if your young son is asking for a BB gun for Christmas, specifically the official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and 'this thing' which tells time, and he will go to any lengths to get it, it's time for the family to start counseling.
The Stone Family – The Family Stone
© 20th Century Fox
When Everett Stone (Dermot Mulroney) brings home his girlfriend Meredith (Sarah Jessica Parker) to meet his perfect family over Christmas, we know they're going to be anything but perfect. The entire lot fancies itself as a relaxed, liberal and NPR-listening family, but as soon as they meet the uptight, "Type A" Meredith, they attack and mock her mercilessly. Especially his mom (Diane Keaton). On Christmas morning when Everett, still hurt by his mother's attacks, cannot bring himself to wish her a merry Christmas, she reveals she's dying of cancer. Hello, manipulation!
The Hobbes Family – Elf
When Buddy the Elf (Will Ferrell) finds out he's adopted, he sets out for New York City to find his birth father. Unfortunately, the optimistic Buddy is soon disappointed to learn his dad is a cold-hearted workaholic children's book executive who cares more about profits than parenting. It's Buddy who has to teach him about the wonders and magic of the holidays and the importance of family. This lesson was much more enjoyable coming from the hilarious Ferrell in tights and elf booties instead of a bunch of bad CGI-ed ghosts from the past, present and future.
The Hood Family – The Ice Storm
From the outside, the Hood family embodies all the elements of a perfect family. During an ice-storm over the Thanksgiving holiday we learn that like in most families what lies beneath the surface will surprise you, because nothings says Thanksgiving like teenage sexual exploration (with a young cast led by Tobey Maguire, Christina Ricci and Elijah Wood), marital deception and wife-swapping!
The Claus Family – Fred Claus
According to Hollywood, sibling rivalry is universal. That's because there's always one kid in every family that is the favorite, the one the parents brag about to their friends: Fred Claus (Vince Vaughn) is not that kid. He steals, lies and crushes the Christmas spirit out of everyone around him. Imagine the pressure with a mother always asking, "Can't you be more like your brother", when your brother is perfection personified and beloved by everyone (except you). I'd hate Santa if he were my brother too!
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